“Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.”
-STEVE JOBS
When I look back on my life I see so many moments where I tried my best to follow the rules, to do what was asked of me and to fit in.
Problem is I don't.
I don't fit in, I rarely agree with the rules and I don't mind doing what is asked as long as it doesn't involve compromising what's true for me and what's best for the greater good.
Buuuuutttt. When I take a good look at myself over the years I see a girl who didn't know it was okay to follow the beat inside her own heart. I followed rules and did what was asked because, I thought, I would be likeable.
Loveable, even.
I believed I would be better accepted if I did what others expected me to do.
I tied my self worth up in doing things for others, and hoping they would like me for it.
This is the exact reason I ended up with intense anxiety and depression two-&-almost-a-half years ago. This is why I left my job for four months.
I don't fit into the status quo. I see things differently.
Becoming an artist means not following the rules about what "real work" is. Following my own heart means loving myself and letting that love be my guide. Turns out, sometimes, people don't like that too much.
But I don't care about that anymore. If that makes me a troublemaker, so be it.
Trouble, I shall make. ;)